Kategorie: General

Be Your Authentic Self: The Courage to Stand Out

Today’s quote comes from Judy Garland: “Be a first-class version of yourself, not a second-class version of someone else.”

Being true to oneself is, in my opinion, one of the most important things in life. Yet, this can be a challenging endeavor. Our experiences shape us, and each of us interprets situations based on what we’ve learned and experienced—both passively and actively. These events define us.

For instance, you might have a twin who looks just like you, but the way you perceive the world and interpret events can be entirely different. Years later, discussing a shared experience can reveal how divergent your memories are, making it feel as though you were in completely different situations.

This uniqueness can make it difficult to be a first-class version of ourselves. When you’re truly being yourself, others might not understand you. They may struggle to empathize or recognize aspects of you that they themselves have never acknowledged.

In the business world, showing emotions or fully sharing your knowledge can sometimes trigger fear in others. A person who dares to be authentic may be seen as a threat, as they embrace their true selves rather than conforming to what others expect. This can create discomfort for those who suppress their own individuality to blend in with the crowd. If someone cannot or will not allow him/herself to be authentic, he/she may feel the need for others to stay away from the authentic person, otherwise they might recognise his/her own learning fields. The authetic person is otherwise a mirror where the unauthentic persons sees the own development fields. This is projection, which means, a „mental process by which people attribute to others what is in their own minds.“ (https://www.britannica.com/science/projection-psychology)

Being a first-class version of yourself requires courage, self-reflection, and the acceptance that you might not be universally liked and could be labeled as „different.“ The advantage is that you can look in the mirror every day and know that you are exactly who you are—human and yet unique.

Have the courage to be yourself. Diversity makes the world more colorful and lovable, not uniformity.

In the midst of difficulty lies opportunity

Today’s quote comes from Albert Einstein. ‘In the midst of difficulty lies opportunity’.

The quote can be perplexing when you’re grappling with significant challenges and dreading potential future events, or when you’re in a phase where you feel utterly stuck, unable to see a way forward.

This is what Albert Einstein’s quote is about: shifting from a carousel of ‚what-ifs‘ to focusing on what’s achievable. It’s natural to dwell on possibilities and indulge in self-pity for a time, but eventually, we must move on to find the positives within our struggles.

Dwelling on possibilities and fears can paralyse the mind and soul, leading to stagnation. Like quicksand, self-pity can pull you down; to escape, you need a firm foundation.

Analogy 1: In the eye of a storm, there is tranquillity, and it is there that you can find the strength to emerge stronger from adversity.

Analogy 2: Muscle growth requires progressively increasing the weight, challenging the muscles. If the weight is too much, it’s sensible to reduce it gradually.

In other words, when difficulties seem overwhelming, it’s practical to tackle them one by one, eliminating them step by step. Often, others extend a helping hand, illuminating options without becoming directly involved.

Each of us has the power to illuminate the darkness for someone else by revealing possibilities. In the end, whether to embrace these opportunities is a decision that lies with the individual confronting the challenges.

It is a direction, not a destination.

Today’s quote from Carl R. Rogers is: „It is a direction, not a destination.“

Carl R. Rogers, the founder of person-centered counseling, believed that the client is at the center, emphasizing empathy with their world and acceptance of their standpoint. It’s not about interpreting or adopting a medical therapeutic viewpoint, but about fully engaging with the person. Solutions are crafted by the clients themselves through listening and a curious, non-demanding approach in conversation. This self-development of solutions leads to more enduring results and better outcomes, as the motivation originates from the clients.

This approach is encapsulated in the quote. Life offers a direction, not a fixed destination / goal. Destinations are known to shift over time. Even if one achieves a meticulously planned destination, it may not fulfill the initial anticipation. Moreover, achieving a destination / goal often leads to the creation of a new, sometimes radically different destination / goal. The journey towards a goal is fraught with unknowns that can never be completely anticipated. Despite this, setting a destination / goal is crucial, but it might be more beneficial to set a direction instead.

Setting a direction and not a destination maintains flexibility and wards off disappointment, as rigid destinations / goals can lead to disillusionment. Directions can adapt if circumstances change, such as an ill-timed moment or inadequate preparation.

Consider hiking: navigating a steep, rocky terrain during a downpour can be perilous; timing is key. Unlike destinations /fixed goals, directions can accommodate spontaneous changes and remain adaptable.

Which destination would have been a better direction for you? I would be happy to hear about your experiences.

If you’re going through hell, keep going.

Today’s quote is from Winston Churchill: „If you’re going through hell, keep going.“

Churchill was the driving force behind Britain’s resistance during the Second World War. He symbolized perseverance and led the alliance between England, the USA, and the USSR. In his inaugural speech, he declared, „I have nothing to offer but blood, toil, tears, and sweat.“ As he surveyed the damage from German bombing raids, the resilient British people called out to him, „We can take it. Pay them back!“(Winston Churchill: Die Schlüsselfigur im Krieg gegen Hitler – [GEO]))

Churchill endured the trials of two world wars, actively participating rather than merely being present. Despite being an unloved son, he maintained self-belief. Confident in his destiny for greatness, he indeed achieved it, securing his legacy as one of Britain’s most eminent politicians. (Winston Churchill – Wikipedia)

The quote is indeed powerful. Hell is depicted as an unpleasant, scorching, dark, and likely solitary place, embodying all conceivable negatives. To not be swayed by this and to persevere demands considerable discipline, persistence, and a touch of obstinacy. Conversely, such conduct, I believe, is replete with hope and motivation. It demonstrates resilience and a robust, steadfast personality. Navigating through hell undeniably necessitates having a goal and a strategy. Adequate preparation would also be advantageous. Particularly when you feel ensnared in hell, it’s crucial to recognize your talents and skills and devise a strategy to escape swiftly.

To stop in hell is to burn up inside. Your only protection is to keep trying and to move on to the next goal with sincerity and a plan.

What advice would you offer to those enduring their own personal hell?

Equality a matter of mindset

My father, who died on 29 February 2024, often used today’s Latin quote of unknown origin. ‘Quod licet lovi, non licet bovi.’ Translated, this means: ‘What is licit to Jupiter is not licit to the ox.’

My father always used this quote when he did something that we were not allowed to do, e.g. having two desserts or driving without wearing a seatbelt.

Applied to the professional situation, some people also tend to think of themselves as Jupiter and people in a lower hierarchical position than the ‘bovis’. For example, a supervisor allows himself to work from abroad for several weeks while his employees have to come into the office. There are also companies where managers dine in a separate area and receive more exquisite meals, than hierarchical lower employees.

Even in everyday life, there are people who think they are better than others and elevate themselves to the status of ‘Iovi’. They push ahead, push others back or turn up their car radios at night and blast through the city, but would complain the other way round if the neighbours‘ children were louder.

Is such a quote still relevant today? In this day and age, you can become anything and quickly lose something or even everything. Does a self-proclaimed ‘Iovi’ always remain an ‘Iovi’ or can he/she quickly become a ‘bovi’ due to external changes and vice versa? Don’t we all need more humility and gratitude in our roles? Because many things can change very quickly, and then it would be wise, if we simply saw ourselves as human beings with the same value, the same rights and with the same emotions and needs.

Wouldn’t it be nicer to meet as equals and allow others to do what we allow ourselves to do?

What are your thoughts?

Doing the „right“ thing a matter of strength?

Today’s quote comes from Michelle Obama: ‘Do what you think is right. There will always be someone who thinks differently.’

Being true to yourself and knowing who you are is one of the most challenging things in my eyes. It means courage and believing in yourself to behave ‘right’. It means being strong, even when the headwinds are so strong that they could blow you over. Standing up to the storms of life and knowing that you simply can’t please everyone. Having a strong character and being at peace with yourself, no matter what accusations or opinions you are exposed to, requires courage and a healthy and good perception of yourself as well self-awareness of the circumstances.

If you do what you think is right, then you are consistent in your actions, know what you want and remain focussed and determined. You are also aware that it can be challenging and that you may ‘offend’ at times. Being single-minded and clear can also be misinterpreted as being tough and unapproachable. In my view, it’s crucial to distinguish between doing the right thing and showing empathy and sensitivity towards others. The real challenge lies in harmonizing these two aspects.

If you try to bend to those who have more power, influence or are higher up in the hierarchy, or simply want to please, you come across as a flag in the wind. Such personalities are also known as „social butterflies“. Such individuals may advance in their careers, but at what cost? Lacking their own direction and personal convictions about what is right for them, they appear to me as chameleons, adapting at will. To me, such a personality is both elusive and discernible. It would not be desirable for me.

Being true to yourself in your own attitude and actions, with your own weaknesses and strengths, is worth much more to me than being a likeable person you can’t grasp. I want to be able to express myself as I am in my own uniqueness. Without offending or hurting others around me, of course.

Wouldn’t it be wonderful if we could all accept and respect each other as we are?