Kategorie: Positive Psychologie

09“Many people are too well-bred to talk with their mouths full—but they have no qualms about doing so with their heads empty.” — Orson Welles

Orson Welles (1915–1985) was a renowned director, actor, screenwriter, and producer, often hailed as one of the most influential filmmakers of the 20th century. His innovative radio broadcast of “The War of the Worlds” (1938) caused widespread panic among listeners, showcasing his keen awareness of the impact of words, punctuation, tone, and emphasis.

Welles understood that eliciting strong emotions—such as panic—through a mere radio broadcast required a deep understanding of not only what he was saying, but more importantly, how he was saying it. He likely weighed every word carefully, recognizing the potential consequences of language. In this context, his quote may seem cynical or harsh, reflecting his frustration with those who choose their words without considering their impact.

It’s crucial to recognize who we are speaking to and to reflect on how our words might resonate. However, the emotional responses and interpretations of our words ultimately depend on the listener’s past experiences, which we cannot fully anticipate or control.

In today’s fast-paced communication landscape, we should take a cue from Welles: think carefully about our words before we speak, acknowledging their power to shape conversations and relationships.

In today’s business environment, how can we ensure our communication is both impactful and considerate of our audience’s perceptions?

„Think less and live more.“ — Johann Georg Hamann

Hamann, a friend of Kant, was an advocate of the Socratic principle of non-knowledge. During his time, he was a critic of the system that believed in pure reason and opposed the consolidation of rationality. In his works, he emphasizes the importance of feelings, faith, and intuition. He also believed that language is alive and enables us to discover deeper truths. Furthermore, he was a proponent of faith as a means to understand the world. His works influenced romantic thinkers, and Goethe referred to him as the brightest mind of his time. Like Hamann, these thinkers placed the individual and subjective experiences at the forefront rather than pure intellect. To illustrate the complexity of nature and humanity, Hamann often employed paradoxes and contradictions.

In this context, the aforementioned quote becomes particularly relevant. It challenges the prevailing trend of viewing the world solely through a rational lens. Thinkers and scientists were highly regarded, while emotions and feelings were often deemed unimportant, as were the individual and his subjective experiences.

Today’s research on emotions highlights the significance of consciously experiencing feelings to foster intrinsic motivation and drive change. Humans are more than just minds and thoughts; emotions are integral to our existence. Every thought, word, and situation evokes emotions. Only when we feel alive can we effect change and move forward. We should take a cue from Hamann and think less, but feel more, embracing life as it is enriched by emotions rather than mere facts.

In light of this perspective, how can we foster a work environment that values emotional intelligence alongside rational thinking?

“Every life phase offers the opportunity to start anew.” – Rita Süssmuth

Every time has its purpose and presents us with challenges. These challenges can lead to two outcomes: either one fails and is overwhelmed, or one finds a way to overcome them. Overcoming does not always mean turning the challenge into success. It can also mean learning to live with it and gaining something positive from the situation.

Imagine that large stones lie in the way of our path. There are three possible reactions:

1. One sits in front of the large boulders, feels sorry for oneself, and waits for someone to remove the stones.

2. One makes an effort and tries to remove the stones using tools like levers. If successful, the path is clear.

3. If one fails, there are two alternatives: either return to the first strategy and wait for help, or find another way, such as building a bypass or a bridge over the stones.

These two alternatives—submitting to circumstances or dealing creatively with them—can also be applied to different life phases. As one grows older, it becomes clear that not everything can be achieved in life, and movement is no longer as easy as in younger years. The focus shifts, and often a wisdom and calmness develop with age that younger people may lack. One can mourn the past and reminisce about how wonderful it was to be a young adult, or one can recognize the wisdom and experience gained over the years.

Every life phase is a new beginning when we learn to deal creatively with challenges. This is possible by accepting the circumstances and changing our perspective. Then, we can view every phase of our life as a chance for a fresh start.

This can only be achieved by freeing oneself from prejudices, clichés, and opinions regarding life phases. How each individual interprets a life phase should be left to them.

“The greatest revelation is silence.” — Laozi

In our fast-paced world, silence often feels elusive, yet it is in these quiet moments that our best insights emerge. Laozi’s wisdom reminds us of the profound impact stillness can have on our lives. Just as children are encouraged to endure boredom to spark creativity, we too must embrace silence for reflection and innovation.

Fuchs (Fuchs, Katharina Anna (2014): Emotionserkennung und Empathie. Eine multimethodale psychologische Studie am Beispiel von Psychopathie und sozialer Ängstlichkeit, Wiesbaden, Deutschland: Springer Fachmedien.) identifies several forms of silence, each serving a unique purpose:

1. Silence as a Background to Speech: This type of silence enhances spoken words and creates space for future dialogue, emphasizing the importance of thoughtful pauses.

2. Silence as Indirect Communication: Unspoken understandings can convey more than words, inviting us to listen deeply and read between the lines.

3. Silence as a Break in Communication: Moments of surprise or shock can lead to a cessation of dialogue, allowing silence to express what words cannot.

4. Silence as a Shared Experience: This transcends verbal communication, fostering profound connections. Silence I creates a palpable tension directed toward the other, while Silence II dissolves this intentionality, allowing for a secure space where genuine relationships can develop. This „I-Thou“ relationship fosters implicit intersubjectivity, connecting individuals without specific intention.

Silence is essential for creation—whether it be new ideas or meaningful relationships. It allows for self-reflection and growth.

When was the last time you embraced silence? In a world that often prioritizes noise, let us not overlook the richness that silence can bring. By welcoming stillness, we open ourselves to insights that can transform our understanding of ourselves and the world around us.

“Pay attention to the small things in the world; they make life richer and more satisfying.” — Carl Hilty

Each morning, when I wake up, my husband is usually already up. He often prepares a wonderful latte macchiato for me, with the right amound of milk and coffee. While this may seem like a small gesture, it never fails to bring a smile to my face and sets a positive tone for my day. When he doesn’t do it—usually only on the rare occasions when he hasn’t slept well or is feeling unwell—I feel the absence of that little ritual throughout the day.

Small moments of joy can come from the simplest things, like our dog resting his snout on my leg, asking to be petted, or the comforting presence of a loved one when I’m not feeling my best. I particularly cherish the little wonders in nature: the first ray of sunlight breaking through the leaves, casting a kaleidoscope of colors; a butterfly fluttering by; or a ladybug exploring a leaf. All of these moments enrich my life and bring me satisfaction.

These are the daily joys that we can appreciate, which are not to be taken for granted. While wealth and money can make life more comfortable and may provide a sense of security, do they truly make life richer in a fulfilling sense? I believe that very wealthy individuals can sometimes feel unsatisfied or even impoverished in spirit. They may wonder if the people around them are truly there for who they are or simply for their wealth and status.

Can a lavishly designed home provide the same happiness as a simple morning coffee shared with a loved one? Of course, one can enjoy both, but what ultimately matters are the small moments where we feel secure and free, allowing us to discover the wonders of the world.

Let us remember to cherish these little things, for they are what truly enrich our lives and bring lasting satisfaction.

“The world can only be good and pure if our lives are good and pure.” — Swami Vivekananda

This quote resonates deeply with me. It suggests that our actions stem from our attitudes and values. Our subconscious strives to align every action with a consistent behavior that reflects our beliefs. We tend to view ourselves in a positive light, often pushing aside any inconsistencies in our behavior. Instead, we reinterpret these discrepancies to maintain a sense of logic and coherence.

This tendency underscores why offering constructive feedback to others can often feel futile, particularly when trust is lacking. When someone’s actions seem inconsistent, the person acting may feel entirely justified in their behavior, believing it to be logical from their perspective. Yet, to an observer, these actions might appear irrational or in need of improvement.

In such cases, feedback may be necessary, but the recipient might be unable or unwilling to accept it. This highlights an important truth: we can only correct and examine our own behavior. It is essential for us to determine whether our thoughts and actions are pure and aligned with our values.

Maintaining awareness of our inner lives is crucial for nurturing the goodness we wish to project into the world. By doing so, we can positively influence the lives of others—not by direct intervention, but by activating their mirror neurons through our authentic actions.

As we embody the purity we seek, we naturally inspire those around us. This aligns with Albert Bandura’s social learning theory, which emphasizes the importance of learning through observation and modeling.

In a world often filled with negativity and chaos, let us strive to cultivate our inner lives. By fostering goodness within ourselves, we can create a ripple effect that touches the lives of others, ultimately contributing to a more positive and pure world.

How do you ensure that your actions reflect your values? Let’s share our insights and support one another on this journey of self-improvement and positive influence.

“Whoever wishes to live in peace with themselves must accept themselves as they are.” — Selma Lagerlöf

I wholeheartedly agree with this sentiment. When we struggle to accept our own nature and essence, we inevitably start to doubt our existence and the decisions we make. Our reactions are deeply rooted in our past experiences and how we have navigated the challenges life has thrown our way.

Living in doubt about our reactions and choices can feel like a boomerang, only causing more confusion and self-blame. Our behaviors and responses are influenced by our upbringing and personal history, each having its rationale. Every action, no matter how it appears, is a reflection of the individual behind it—provided, of course, that it does not involve wrongdoing.

The interpretation of our actions by others can lead to judgments and condemnation. At that moment, we might feel that we cannot change our reactions; however, we can analyze them later and strive to learn and grow from those experiences. This process is only possible if we forgive ourselves and make peace with our behavior.

Each of us must learn to accept ourselves as we are. There was a valid reason for our past actions, shaped by our experiences. We can learn from what has happened, but only if we do so with full self-acceptance. It is only in a state of kindness towards ourselves that we can understand the reactions of others and learn from them.

Failing to accept ourselves leads to self-blame and feelings of inadequacy. Living in acceptance of ourselves and our past means finding peace within ourselves and the world around us.

In a world that often demands perfection, let’s remember that true growth comes from embracing who we are—flaws and all. By cultivating self-acceptance, we not only foster our own inner peace but also create a more compassionate environment for those around us.

Let’s embark on this journey of self-discovery and acceptance together. How do you practice self-acceptance in your life?