Kategorie: Balanced life

Of meaningfull importance for learning and improvement: Reflection

“Without reflection, we go blindly on our way, creating more unintended consequences, and failing to achieve anything useful.” – Margaret J. Wheatley

This quote of Margaret J. Whealtey is fantastic as it brings it to the point. To learn from others around you, your circumstances your are in and from your self to become your better self reflection is more than important and needed.

But how reflection could be easy mastered in the full days we are facing with. Here are some thoughts and tipps for this:

Helpfull is to go through these four steps, which you can see in the picture:

1. Step: Observe

the situation in a retrospective or during the situation from the metaperspective

2. Step: Reflect

with the following questions:

a. What?

This question focus on the past. (e.g., What in detail had happened? What are the facts?)

b. So what?

This question focus on the present (e.g., What I have learned? What is my conclusion?

c. Now what?

This question focus on the future. (e.g., What I will change or retain in the future? What direction I will follow?)

3. Step: Plan

the steps and think in small nuggets (KISS = Keep it short and simple) which is really feasible. To make it easy you can follow these Acronyms:

4. Step: Act

following your plan. This is the most difficult step as the new way of interaction is new and unusual to this. The first times it will feel foreign and perhaps a bit threatening. It is like jumping the first time from three-meter diving tower. During the jump you sometimes regret it to have been jumped. But when you have landed save down in the water, you feel proud and happy.

For your reflection you need:

  • Time and space
  • A good environment with a positive atmosphere
  • Emotional supportive environment

Spiral dynamics: Motives as basic of our behaviour and success in the VUCA world

n communication, it is a challenge to be seen and recognized as a partner. Conversations at eye level /as peers are a challenge, when different ways of thinking meet. Flexible thinking would be helpful in such moments. This requires a different attitude as well as a different level of consciousness than exists mainly in the Western world.

Clare C. Graves, evidenced by Don Beck and Chris Cowan, has found different levels of consciousness, which she distinguishes into eight different levels of existence with different patterns of thinking. These thought patterns are based on the motives that drive them. She called this Spiral Dynamics.

Most people in the Western world belong to the first levels / graves (Graves, C. W. (1974). Human Nature Prepares for a Momentous Leap. The Futurist, 72-87.). What they have in common is an egocentric attitude.

The levels of existence, also called Spiral Dynamics. The eight levels / graves are colour coded. They are referred to as WMem. WMem is defined as follows: „A WMem is expressed in a world-view, a value system, a psychological level of existence, a belief structure, an organizational principle, a way of thinking and living“ (Beck and Cowan, 2008, p. 64).

In addition, authors Don Edward Beck and Christopher C. Cowan distinguish between first and second Tier thinking. People with a first Tier mindset usually behave in an ego-driven manner with the main question in mind: „What is the benefit for me? What’s in it for me?“ The first Tier includes five different graves of consciousness with the colours beige, purple, red, blue and orange.

The basic motifs and world-view of the first Tier are:

– Physiological stability (beige),

– Security (purple),

– Domination and power (red),

– Sense and order (blue),

– Autonomy and manipulation (orange),

– Equality and community (green)

The second Tier includes two different graves of consciousness. The second Tier world-view enables the person to respond flexibly to change, to take interconnected, comprehensive perspectives, and to recognize the dynamics of the whole earth, enabling macro-level action. This mindset is consistent with ecosystem and empathic relationship. People with the second Tier mindset tend to behave in an eco-oriented way, asking the most important questions, The questions in their mind are: „What is the benefit of the system in which I am involved? What is the bigger picture and impact on the earth / my environment?“ This second Tier includes two different consciousnesses with the colours yellow and turquoise.

The basic motifs and world-views of the second Tier are:  

– Flexibility and natural flow (yellow),

– Life and harmony (turquoise)

Most people are mixed types with different degrees of expression of the first or second level.

The transition from the first to the second level is crucial for the transition from ego-system to eco-system, which is necessary in the VUCA world (Voluntil, Uncertain, Complex, Ambigue) and to evolve to a „Learning Organisation“.

Because of the attitude and mindset of flexibility and harmony, there are no biases, prejudices, or other hierarchical challenges to overcome. The focus is on solving a problem together and developing a process, not on who gets the credit.

How to show appreciation, our quiet power?

Appreciation of a person is always focusing on personal behavior. It has nothing to do with performance or success. Appreciation is close looking at the individual nature character in each of us. Appreciation only works when other elements of the interaction are already done. 

  1. You need to have shown attention for the whole situation where the person you want to appreciate is in; 
  2. This only works when you are in the moment and mindful in the situation. 
  3. Towards the individuum to show respect and personal attention is needed. 
  4. Then acknowledgement for the performance or success, which mean for the results of the behavior is needed. 
  5. Only with this previous elements appreciation will work, as the appreciation taker find the apprechiative words natural and creates not the feeling that the apprechiation is used for the sace of a (hidden) goal.

(inspired by: Das Wunder der Wertschätzung from Dr. Reinhard Haller)

Appreciation does not need grand gestures or materialistic things. Like wild-flowers, appreciation is fragile and small, but strong. They need only a few nutrients, to develop to the whole power. Wild-flowers can penetrate and destroy concrete. Honest and genuine appreciation can have a similar effect and create a blossom relationships, which leads to trust.

How do I show appreciation in everyday life?

  • Appreciative look at eye level.
  • Interested listening.
  • Benevolent nod of the head.
  • Sympathetic smile.
  • Discreet pat on the back.
  • Curious question.
  • Small surprise.
  • Short e-mail with thanks or congratulations.
  • Request for advice.

What are your little things you show your appreciation to people surrounding you?

Thoughts about: Is knowledge power?

Francis Bacon (1561 – 1626) said: „Knowledge is power.“

Does education equal power, or is knowledge enough to be powerful? That would be in my eyes too short-sighted.

Knowledge supports the expression of one’s own opinion, which is freedom and a fundamental right in Germany.

Does expressing an informed opinion actually lead to more power?

In the VUCA world, knowledge is more accessible than in the time of Francis Bacon. Anyone can acquire knowledge, so titles or positions do not necessarily mean that there is more knowledge in specific areas than in hierarchically lower positions or less status.

So knowledge is not the same as power. Knowledge enables people to change things, to innovate, but it is not identical with the ability to gain power. Therefore other abilities of character are necessary.

Here are a few thoughts about „Knowledge is power“.

  1. Does knowledge mean knowing the truth? What is truth? We construct our own truth, knowledge is interpreted differently, which is why only an approximation to the truth is possible, if it exists at all.
  2. What does general knowledge mean? Who has determined what we mean by general knowledge? General knowledge is taught at school, the basis comes from Humboldt in the 19th century. Is this still up to date and contemporary? Is general education sufficient to prepare for the VUCA world? Who knows which knowledge is really useful to find one’s way in life?
  3. How does knowledge help to find one’s way in life? We all know it, we plan our life and then something comes up, and we have to change our goals. Broad-based knowledge helps us to act flexibly and to find our way in the VUCA world. One-sided knowledge can lead to a lack of flexibility, and unforeseen events can throw you off track.
  4. Does science lead to becoming wiser? Science and knowledge are challenging to define. Philosophers suggest that despite knowledge, we do not become wiser, but only refine our view of the world until intractable situations arise that require a new world-view.

(To read more about this, please visit: Wer viel weiß, hat viel zu sagen – ist Wissen Macht? (uni.de))

Knowledge does not equal power, but it makes the knower powerful. Knowledge makes it possible to understand things and to recognize connections. It can support going new ways, developing ideas and discovering one’s own life path/passion. It can also lead to other people not being able to understand connections that are clearly recognizable to the knower, and this then leads to discomfort or can be interpreted as a threat. Knowledge can lead to power or be seen as disturbing.

The „Diamond of life-span“

Different studies have shown that it is possible to live a better life in old age.

Various aspects and actions, as well as collaborative relationships between people, increase well-being and positive mindset in old age. These found patterns are called the relationship matrix.

The four pillar of the relationship matrix are from each other dependent. All together are called „the diamonds of life-span“.

These pillars of „the diamond of life-span“ are:

  1. Relationship resources: Neighbors, friends, acquaintances, positive people of the past, where dialogs are still happened in the mind, belong to this group.
  2. Personal health / well-being: this are the medical standards and the personal view on the own health.
  3. Positive mindset: The individual happiness, optimism and well being of the own life
  4. Activity: The active participation on mental and body activities

These four pillars influence each other and interact with each other.

Here are some influences of the relationships, which are through research proven:

Relationship resources <=> personal health / well-being

People with good relationship are active together, caring for each other. Studies showed that recovery from a mental or physical illness are faster when strong positive emotional relationship are there. People are more willingly to go to physician, when a partner is on their side. To make new acquaintances happens easier when you feel healthy.

Relationship resources <=> positive mindset

Positive relationships build self-confidence and support to build meaningful goals as well give solace in heavy times. Positive attitude towards life and your self leads to more empathy, love, friendliness, and indulgence. This together improves and deepen relationship.

Positive mindset <=> activity

Positive mindset leads to trust and optimism. Activities leads to positive memories and happier feelings. Activities is in relation to satisfaction

Positive mindset <=> personal health / well-being

Researcher is convinced that positive mindset leads to personal health and well-being. In a nun study researcher found that positive emotions written in a youth diary leads to an older age. Nuns which express fewer positive emotions in the youth died to 54% under the age of 80. Compared with the nuns with positive emotions in their diary only 24% died under 80

Personal health / well-being <-> activity

Personal health enables more activity, and more activity leads to better health.

Relationship resources <-> activity

Relationship invites to more activities. This extent the own interests and creates curiosity. An active live lead to more social activities and supports in this way the relationship.

Looking at the four pillars the most important of this is the relationship to others, as this is the source for well-being and a healthy aging.

Let this diamond shine over your lifespan.

To read more about it, klick here

What is the reason of gullibility?

We all know that rumours and allegations are often long-lasting. False insinuations spread via spoken words or facial expressions and gestures persist in the organization for a long time, even if the facts and data refute them. Researchers discovered social and cognitive factors that explain the persistence of rumours and allegations.

These are here summarized:

Cognitive factors

1. Intuition („gut feeling“) through:

  • Little analysis
  • Less analytical thinking

2. Cognitive inaccuracy due to:

  • References to sources are neglected or forgotten
  • Own knowledge is not applied
  • Counter-evidence is neglected  

3. Illusory truth:

  • Familiarity of information
  • Fluency
  • Cohesion with own experience

Social factors

1. Credibility of groups through:

  • Hierarchies (elites)
  • Degree of attraction / attractiveness
  • Own social affiliation

2. World views through

  • personal views
  • Affiliation to a party

3. Emotions

  • One’s own emotional state
  • Information itself is presented emotionally

The whole study can be found under this link: Eckert et al.

The five Toltec promises

From Don Miguel Ruiz

1. Let your words be blameless: This means be integer what you say, which is the case when you are honest in what you are thinking without attacking the conversational partner verbally. This means as well without manipulation, lying or cheating. (Asserting without attacking)

2. Don’t take anything personally: If you take something personally, you will behave ego-driven and lose your own balanced integrity. The person who has hurt you, thus, gains power over your behaviour. 

3. Do not draw hasty conclusions: Take it like Socrates, „I know that I know nothing.“. Our own assumptions are related to our experiences, not to the now.

4. Always do your best: When you have a project, do the best you can with all your energy and knowledge. When you have done it, let it go. Don’t Think about it any more, doubt or criticize what you have done. Perfectionism is often a lack of self-confidence and creates lasting dissatisfaction.

5. See your projects as continuous learning: Problems are always only an interpretation of the situation we are experiencing. Situations are neutral in themselves, it is our assumptions and interpretations, coming from our experiences in the past, which judge them. The own judgement have an effect by generating feelings and emotions, which drives our behaviour and at the end the result. Problems always hold the possibility to learn, grow and develop.