Doing the „right“ thing a matter of strength?

Today’s quote comes from Michelle Obama: ‘Do what you think is right. There will always be someone who thinks differently.’

Being true to yourself and knowing who you are is one of the most challenging things in my eyes. It means courage and believing in yourself to behave ‘right’. It means being strong, even when the headwinds are so strong that they could blow you over. Standing up to the storms of life and knowing that you simply can’t please everyone. Having a strong character and being at peace with yourself, no matter what accusations or opinions you are exposed to, requires courage and a healthy and good perception of yourself as well self-awareness of the circumstances.

If you do what you think is right, then you are consistent in your actions, know what you want and remain focussed and determined. You are also aware that it can be challenging and that you may ‘offend’ at times. Being single-minded and clear can also be misinterpreted as being tough and unapproachable. In my view, it’s crucial to distinguish between doing the right thing and showing empathy and sensitivity towards others. The real challenge lies in harmonizing these two aspects.

If you try to bend to those who have more power, influence or are higher up in the hierarchy, or simply want to please, you come across as a flag in the wind. Such personalities are also known as „social butterflies“. Such individuals may advance in their careers, but at what cost? Lacking their own direction and personal convictions about what is right for them, they appear to me as chameleons, adapting at will. To me, such a personality is both elusive and discernible. It would not be desirable for me.

Being true to yourself in your own attitude and actions, with your own weaknesses and strengths, is worth much more to me than being a likeable person you can’t grasp. I want to be able to express myself as I am in my own uniqueness. Without offending or hurting others around me, of course.

Wouldn’t it be wonderful if we could all accept and respect each other as we are?

Systemic Leadership SANTIAGO

The quote for this article comes from Buddha: „If you stretch a string too tight, it will break. If you stretch it too weakly, you won’t be able to play it.“

This can be applied to all situations in life. Especially when raising your own children or in leadership. As a manager, this is particularly relevant in business. This reminds me of the SANTIAGO model by Prof. Dr. phil. Dr. h.c. Rolf Arnold. SANTIAGO is a systemic leadership approach. In this approach, the change comes from within the person themselves and is not attempted to be brought about from the outside. By asking questions, the string of change is slightly tightened so that a „play“ is possible. SANTIAGO is an acronym (but works only in German) and means the following:

S = Vicarious leadership: The leader motivates self-leadership. Leader and follower accept each other and recognise each other’s expertise. Managers understand that they cannot actively control their employees and move away from feeling responsible for everything. They develop expertise in the team. This includes two aspects: 1. facilitation-orientated, which means that goals are developed and clarified in a participative manner. 2. potential-orientated, i.e. training needs, and development potential are regularly assessed and supported.

A = Autopoiesis means that systems, including people, are self-regulating and cannot be controlled from the outside. Managers only intervene when intervention is necessary. The disruptions to the system are appropriate through e.g. coaching questions with the knowledge that the solution should come from the employee. Holistic, networked thinking is crucial here. Knowledge acquisition can only be self-directed, and employees take responsibility for their own learning and their learning competence. Knowledge is not only acquired, but also actively demanded and applied.

N = Sustainability means that everyone in the team is allowed to be authentic so that changes are established in the long term. Team members are stimulated by challenging tasks and projects to be worked on independently and by questions that are questioning to interrupt patterns of the team members. By interrupting patterns, the previous reality is scrutinised and the previous world view is changed. This takes place in three stages: Reflection on the action, the behaviour, analysis of the situation and consideration of a new, changed action. These three stages circulate and thus form learning loops.

T= Transformation stands for questioning interpretation patterns and interpretations and making the team aware that their own point of view is only one possible view. As a manager, you are there to de-escalate through looking for arguments for different points of view. Reflection is encouraged. Existing mental models are critically analysed and adapted. Adaptation can only come about through intrinsic motivation, which the manager encourages by asking coaching questions and setting appropriate tasks in order to leave the comfort zone.

I = Interpretation means that perception arises on the basis of one’s own patterns of interpretation. These patterns of interpretation are the basis of attitudes and therefore of actions. For the team, it is important to recognise the patterns of interpretation in order to then irritate the familiar processes based on experience. So that the team member begins to question these themselves. In order to change the interpretations, a link with the organisational values is necessary. The values are thus guidelines for new interpretations to be learnt, and thus for the attitude that then brings about the action.

A = Arrangement serves to create the space for reflection, irritation and reinterpretation of interpretation patterns and interpretations. Managers need suitable strategic arrangements to enable their employees to learn and lead themselves. This requires clarity of purpose and clear transparency. The key question is: „What do we need to do today to remain successful?“

G= Serenity is a crucial point, as actual change can only come from within. As a manager, you cannot bring about a change in a team member yourself; each team member can only bring about change on their own. It is important to focus on the essentials and wait for the right time to irritate the reality of the individual.

O = Organisational development the change of thinking patterns and interpretations of the individual gradually changes the organisation. The organisation itself is an autopoetic system that can be changed by the members of the organisation. Changes occur through so-called double learning loops. Projects that are not successful or do not succeed change actions in the first learning loop. If the projects are not significantly more successful, a change in attitude and values is required. This is how organisational development comes about. The central question is: „Why do we need this?“

No or yes what is your boomerang

Today’s quote comes from Henry David Thoreau: „The more things a man can leave behind, the richer he is.“

Looking past things, focussing on the essentials and letting everything go is always good advice. Only by looking away from time to time can I find more time for the essentials. Looking away is not meant in the sense of looking away from injustice, but rather not chasing after the children, putting away the dishwasher or letting the grass in the garden grow for a week longer.

What is the most important thing in life? This is something different for everyone, and there is no right or wrong here, either. It’s a question of your own socialisation, your own interpretation and your own experiences. Leaving things undone when something else in life is more important than the thing that needs to be done, then the person who allows to say no is the richer one. You can only say no with a clear conscience and thereby let something be loved if you know what is more important to you.

By saying no, you are saying yes to something else.

It only becomes difficult when you tend to say no as a matter of principle. Then you don’t say yes to something else that makes you richer, and can become a boomerang, as you deprive yourself of the opportunity to learn. Finishing something and not leaving it lying around can enrich you just as much as leaving things lying around.

What makes you richer in saing no, depends on the things and the circumstances.

Why pre-thining is better than direct acting

Today’s quote comes from Lao Tzu: „Doing nothing is better than doing nothing with a lot of effort.“

That’s an interesting quote. In other words, according to Lao Tzu, it is better to lay your hands in your lap than to try to achieve something without success and without a goal.

My interpretation of the quote is that effort alone is not enough if the goal and focus are not defined. You also need skills and abilities to create, i.e. knowledge of what to do or how to do something. You also need a vision – what do you want to achieve? What should be better, different later?

Effort alone is not enough if the project is aimless, lacks resources or knowledge, has not been thought through or planned for. Whilst effort is an important ingredient for success, as the German proverb says: „No pain, no gain“, it only becomes a success factor if the other ingredients, such as knowledge, goal and plan, as well as the necessary resources are planned for.

In this respect, doing nothing is better than simply getting started. Doing nothing has another advantage, as it allows new thoughts and ideas to emerge. They lead to making targeted plans and implementing them step by step in a focussed manner. By doing nothing, you can invest the time to find a plan, develop a vision, acquire the necessary knowledge and then find the resources to turn the idea into reality.

Defeat is the source of success

Today’s quote comes from Danny DeVito: ‘The best are not afraid of defeat. It’s part of success.’

That sounds paradoxical when you first read it. Isn’t defeat to be equated with failure?

In fact, many people would think that defeat is a failure. In the short term this may be true, but in the long term I think it’s a fallacy.

Here are my reasons why defeat is the cause of success:

1. Without a defeat, you stick to the old and familiar behaviour. After all, your previous behaviour has proved you right, because it has led to your current success. Defeat gives you the opportunity to rethink your behaviour, to learn and to develop further.

2. Defeats open up the opportunity to discover something unexpected. My great-uncle, for example, was taken prisoner by the French during the Second World War. It was a defeat in the truest sense of the word. During his captivity, he met his future wife and became the owner of a large farm, became mayor of the town and had four children. He died happily in France.

3. Defeats also give you the motivation to improve and not to experience such a similar defeat again.

There are certainly other positive aspects that arise from a defeat. If something positive has come out of a defeat for you, I would be delighted to hear your comments.